don't ya hate it when that happens?
Monday, March 13, 2006
it's not going to be pretty...
i'm in one of those negative moods where nothing surprises me. alma just got into a car accident sat and i'm sooo glad she's ok (and her bf). she just broke her thigh pretty badly, but the three passengers in the back got it the worst. so what i gather from my mom, a car spun out in oakland on the highway and hit alma's side of the car so initially she was the only one hurt. after the car stopped spinning it was smoking so they were scared and took off their seatbelts and tried to get out of the car. then another car hit them while they were trying to get out ot the car and the three in the back went flying and are all in critical condition.argh.. things just seem to be going forward through the muck in my world. i've got "friends" who ignore me now too. the world is so weird. some more family drama... hmmm, everyone has problems right? yeah. and everyone's mom has cancer, everyone's getting an aneurism, into car accidents, getting migraines, getting berated by family, and the bottom layer is what dance i'm trying to do at work to just get on the right path b/c apparently i'm a bs of engineering behind and there's "no way" of catching up. this middle finger is for all you fuckheads that think so much of yourself and think that your life is sooo much more important than everything and everyone else.
all the artsy fartsy people who find refuge in being different yet still look down on people, all the people who look down on artsy fartsy people b/c they're different, all the people who judge people who have babies out of wedlock, all the engineers and other workers pushing other people down b/c they need to feel important, all the "friends" who cause drama and make no fucking sense (and some of whom owe me money), all the people i've given to, but only give me headache or heartache, all the people who think they're the smartest......and i just dont' feel like reaching out to people just cuz anymore.. i feel like i have too little effort to spread out like that so i finally dont' see the point in caring about everybody... b/c i can't.. and then there wouldn't be enough for me and those i really love.
okok, so there are things that are going great, but i think i've just gotten a little better or more callous to things that happen that aren't so great. i think my attitude is more, well, if you can't do anything to change it, might as well just live with it..
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